The Road Home

Is she excited or terrified?  Filled with anticipation or apprehension?  There are so many emotions inside that it is nearly impossible to distinguish where one leaves off and another one begins.  Today is the first day of her new job, one she has dreamed of and worked hard to achieve.  As she fastens her ID badge onto her new lanyard, she looks once again at the words printed underneath her name: Social Worker.  She can hardly believe that she works for a child protection agency.  That she has an amazing opportunity to make a difference in children’s lives!

The very first case assigned to her involves a tiny baby girl, recently born in a nearby hospital.  The baby’s parents do not have the ability to care for their baby, but finding a willing and qualified foster family has proven to be quite a challenge.   Current foster homes are full or only take school age children or specialize in teenagers with behavioral challenges.  And many foster families, even the excellent ones, are reluctant to care for a child with special needs.  Fear of the unknown tends to paralyze even the most willing heart.

Child Protective Services (CPS) finally identifies a family who lives in another county an hour and a half away.  It is not an ideal situation, especially since the goal is for this child to be reunified with her parents, but this family has a good reputation in the foster care community, and they are not only willing, but excited about welcoming this little one into their home!

What the naive social worker lacks in experience, she compensates with much vigor and enthusiasm.  If the goal is for this family to be reunified, then she will, she promises herself, do everything in her power to make that happen.  She will help pave the road home.

Are We Insane? - Part 1

Honestly?!  Are you insane?  Why would you do such a thing?

The questions sting and they momentarily dampen my enthusiasm, but they are not altogether unexpected.  Not everyone is a huge fan of me and my family and our long-term ministry as foster parents.  It does seem insane.  For those who do not have the passion to provide a safe and loving home for a vulnerable child, it does defy comprehension.  What can I say?

My husband and I have been thinking and praying about taking another “placement” for a few months, and in our human perspective of things, we thought that an elementary-aged child would fit perfectly into our family.  However, when we received “the call” and heard the story of the precious newborn in need of a temporary family, we knew almost immediately that we would say yes.  That she was the one whom the Lord was asking us to love.

In Search of Ordinary

When we see the look of sheer panic on the teacher’s face this Sunday morning, we almost laugh.  We stand in the doorway, bringing in our assortment of children, trying to wrangle their energy and herd them inside.  She reacts as if we are bringing wild animals into her tidy classroom instead of spruced-up, shiny-faced, Sunday-best little boys and girls.

We have a rainbow of children between us, my friend and I, all of them close in age, all of them different colors, some of them differently-abled, not one of them quiet.  We do make quite a spectacle when we are out, two white mamas with red and yellow, black and white little ones following close behind.  We wish people didn’t feel the need to stare.  Or look at us like we are from another planet.  We just want to be ordinary mamas with our ordinary families enjoying an ordinary Sunday at church.

A Chance to Thrive (Part 1)

The Dilemma

“I’m sorry, but there’s nothing else we can do.  Our goal now is to make him as comfortable as possible until the end.”  The doctor stood at the child’s bedside, uttering the words as gently as possible, terrible words that no parent ever imagines hearing.  The tiny, frail little boy had just celebrated his first birthday  - if you can call lying in a hospital bed hooked up to monitors and tubes a celebration – and had long ago been labeled “Failure to Thrive.”   The disease that raged through his fragile body during his first year of life had simply been too much of a struggle for him to continue fighting.  He had given up on his desire to live, and now, apparently, the doctors were giving up as well.

Where are the Lifeboats?

The sun shone brightly overhead, lending warmth to the chilly spring day.  The excitement in the air was palpable, as passengers leaned over the deck railings and waved farewell to friends and loved ones on shore.  The lively music from the band on board, the streamers zigzagging through the air, and the prim and proper crew members liberally offering champagne were all evidence of the celebration that this moment deserved: after four years of designing, building, fitting, and trial runs, the ship was finally embarking on her maiden voyage.

Some of the passengers had waited their entire lives for this amazing opportunity, saving their hard-earned wages, reading up on tour books and collecting travel brochures, and dreaming of the adventure that lay ahead.  Perhaps a few were seasoned travelers, having made several similar voyages in the past, and although there was no denying the joyous occasion, their enthusiasm was balanced with a dose of reality.   There may have even been some who felt anxiety and trepidation about the impending passage, unsure of how susceptible they are to seasickness, or how the unfamiliar food will taste, or what unknown dangers lay in the middle of the ocean when no land is in sight.   But whoever they were and whatever their personal thoughts and emotions at that particular moment, once the ocean-liner left the dock, they knew that there would be no turning back.

The birth of a newborn baby into a family is generally a joyous occasion, often celebrated, not only by the mother and father themselves, but together with friends, families, and loved ones.  It marks the beginning of an adventurous journey!  Some parents have eagerly awaited this moment with careful planning and preparation by reading parenting books or taking classes, and decorating the new baby’s room.  Other parents may be hesitant and anxious about their new role, not quite sure what to expect in the months and years ahead.  There may even be some who have stumbled upon this moment unintentionally, but instead of choosing other options like abortion or adoption, they resolve to embark on this excursion with courage and optimism.  But regardless of their individual situations and attitudes, one thing is certain: the addition of a child into one’s family is an irrevocable, life-changing moment.